Hair cut, slightly more than two bits

Yesterday I went to get a hair cut, and either they double booked my guy or the lady before me was taking a looonnng time, but there were two of us waiting for hair cuts at the same time.

So instead of making me wait around, they gave me. . . wait for it. . . The Super Special Awesome Conditioner!! DUN Dun dun....

Only I didn't know it at the time. So there I was, enjoying the shampoo, which is really the best part of any hair cut, and then the girl brings out this long, feathery rope looking thing.

She looped it around my head twice, careful not to disturb the little soft serve ice cream shape she'd sculpted my hair into, and then placed a shower cap over it. She was very careful that the elastic from the cap came down on the feathery headband, so I wouldn't have to suffer the horrors of "ring around the forehead"

That's why I love salons. I like knowing that there's a place in this world that will protect you from all the horrors of life as represented by the elastic band of a shower cap.

It was a ridiculous bit of pampering, but I loved it.

THEN I had to sit under the the domed heat thingy. The thingy you always see in movies, and old ladies are sitting under it with their hair wrapped in enormous pink curlers.

You know that THINGY.

The girl set this enormous timer for ten minutes, and told me in dire tones not to move until the time was up. Her tone implied that if I moved early, something just awful would happen.

Perhaps the shower cap was more evil than I was giving it credit for. Either way, I was happy to while away ten minutes in a comfortable chair while my head was gently heated. Unfortunately the only thing to read was celebrity gossip magazines.

Things I learned from my time in the comfy chair:

1. Britney Spears has a parenting coach

2. Lindsay Lohan has a girlfriend

3. Some actress out there as really ugly boots. I don't remember her name, but the boots looked like they were made from ewok pelts.

Nothing else made it past short term memory.

After I got my hair cut, I tried to figure out just what it was that the super special awesome conditioner did, besides keep me occupied for about 20 minutes. After my hair was fully dried, I had all these really fine wispy hairs, rising like a halo from my scalp.

Truly, they conditioned my head fuzz. Which being on my head, is far longer and thicker than head fuzz has any right to be. A little hair product should take care of that though.

And after trying to recreate the cute do my guy came up with, I'm convinced that he's the only person in the world who can get all of my hair to curl in the same direction at the same time.

Must be the conditioner.