Ninja Report 3: West Virginia, Mountain Mama

Sing along everybody.

"Blue Ridge mountains, Shenendoah River."

This weekend BSA and I drove to West Virginia and went white water rafting on the lower New River. We went as part of a group of YSA's from church, so there were about 30 of us in all.

Friday Night: BSA and I rode down with our friend The Teacher, who was playing in the softball championship game. (church ball) So we got a bit of a late start. We left on our 5 hour drive at 11:30 Friday night.

Amazingly, we did not get stuck in traffic on the 66. Although there were still plenty of cars out.

3:00-4:00: Driving through a heavy fog in the West Virginian mountains is Eerie. There was a full moon and everything. Every now and then we'd pass a coal mining operation with all their flood lights and machine lights bouncing oddly in the fog. I couldn't decide if anticipating an attack from Vampires or Aliens would be more appropriate.

4:30: Arrive at our campground. Fortunatley The Teacher had sent her tent down with an earlier party, and they were kind enough to set it up for us. We just grabbed our sleeping bags and crashed, trying to make the most of our three hours before we had to get up and report to the rafting lodge.

5:00: Some jerk has his cell phone alarm set. It rings loudly about 15 times before falling silent. It will do this every ten minutes until:

7:30: We get up. There are many evil and violent mutterings about cell phone jerk. He is foremost in our thoughts until we realize the enormous spider on the side of the tent is actually on the INSIDE and not on the outside as previously thought.

Hijinks ensue. Spider does evenutally end up dead.

8:00: BSA and I suit up, arming ourselves with paddle, life vest, and helmet. Due to popularity of the river, we don't actually hit the water until almost 9:30.

This makes BSA very unhappy. She manages to restrain her fury, and fails to bite or audit anybody.

We were in a four man raft. BSA and I were up on the front of the raft, where we had first contact with the waves and minimal contact with the actual raft. More on that later.

The other two in our boat were a guy and girl we didn't know. They were very entertaining. Especially the girl, who challenged every boat we passed to a duel, a water war, or stealthy night vengeance. My favorite battle cry of hers was "I'm coming for you [name redacted]! I'm coming for you like an eel in the night!"

Which then led us to become: Team Night Eel.

It was only later that I learned that they were entertaining more than they were working. Which was annoying, but also a bit of a relief. I was about ready to start lifting weights because I thought I'd gone really wimpy. Turns out that BSA and I were hauling around an entire boat.

I can't even begin to describe to you how sore I was Sunday morning. In fact, my muscles are still complaining today.

The New River is gorgeous. It goes through some amazing countryside. You have the mountains rising above you, and every square inch is packed in with decidious trees. The banks are lined with enormous rocks. It must be incredibly beautiful in the fall. Hopefully we'll come back and run the gully in October.

The New River has rapids from Class 1 (baby rapids) up to Class 5. A samurai lady at my fortress/office disputes this, saying they only have Class 5 rapids in the gulley. However, our guide said we went down two Class 5 rapids Saturday. I don't know who's right. If it's water bouncing off a rock, it's a rapid to me.

On the Class 1s they let us hop out of the raft and swim down the rapids. That was fun. The water was actually warm and very pleasant to drift around in.

We lost BSA over the side on one rapid. (Class unknown, either 4 or 5) I fell off on another.

Actually, technically, I didn't fall of the raft, the raft left me.

We were bouncing through some rapids that featured many, many enormous rocks. Our raft bounced up along side a rock and started to tip over. Now our guide told us that if that happened, he would yell "High Side! High Side!" and everyone should jump to the high side so that the raft wouldn't tip over. (The low side is the side in the water)

Anyway, the guide yells "High Side!" and since I'm going into the water, I un-wedge myself and go to jump to the opposite end of the raft. Suddenly the raft is no longer there. I have just enough time to feel like Wile E. Coyote, hanging in midair with a big question mark above my head, before I fall into the water.

Fortunately there was a big rock underneath me, so I didn't go very deep. I bounced off the rock and into the current, which then preceded to smash me up against the side of the raft. I grabbed on to a rope and my raft mates pulled me in.

Corbeau + Being Pulled in the Raft = The Very Picture of Dignity.

That's all I'm going to say about that.

It was a blast. I have very sore muscles, some fascinating bruises, and two scarlet knees.

Apparently, my knees and upper thighs have the power to reject sunscreen. I applied the same sunscreen (30 SPF) everywhere, and most of me looks as if I stayed inside and played computer games all weekend. But my knees and thighs are a lovely, painful shade of scarlet.

Now I have that funky old lady gait because I'm trying to walk with minimal contact between clothing and burn.