Monday Night Fight

On Monday nights I go to a Krav Maga self defense class in Chinatown. The class doesn't start until six, so usually I go to the park and read. Thanks to daylight savings time, it's now too dark and cold to read outside. So I go to the class, and hang out in the little lobby area.

Monday I got there pretty early, about 5:15. There was a bag class going on, and the instructor was an extremely muscled man with a high and tight and a military style of motivation. (Turns out he used to be Navy Air Crew, we'll call him Navy AC). Anyway, he only had one girl there for bag class, and since they're offering free trials this month, he invited me to join.

It was a lot of punching. Lots and lots of punching. So much punching, that I wore through the skin of my knuckles, even though I was wearing gloves. When I wasn't punching the bag, I was jump roping.

That took me awhile to get started. The last time I jumped rope I had a crimped ponytail on the side of my head.

Anyway, it was a really good workout, and I got some good one on one instruction. Especially after a couple of sets, when the other girl kept trying to curl into a ball. And the instructors would yell out "Move around. Walk it off, you're going to faint!" Then they would ask me if I felt okay and I'd grin like an idiot and they'd give me another set.

She also kept trying to cheat on her push ups, and since Navy AC was military, that just meant we kept doing more push ups.

She quit before the class was over, and then Navy AC taught me slapping. Because learning to back hand the snot out of someone without breaking your fingers is an important life skill. It was also loads of fun, and slapping makes this really satisfying THWACK sound when you hit the bag.

He gave me ten minutes to rest before I started my Krav class. My arms were shaky, my shirt was soaked, and I had a stitch in my side. The other girl gave up and went home instead of staying for the next class. My partner for class looked at me and said "Wow, you look really tired."

We did more push ups in the group class. I just flopped to the ground, panting, until the up command was given and then I'd roll up. It's MUCH easier to cheat on push ups in a big group. I used my finely tuned "rest while the Petty Officer isn't looking" skills that I developed in boot camp.

We started drilling, and learned some new techniques. That was fine with me, as it meant standing around in a circle to watch the instructors. We were doing eye strikes when my partner said "I feel faint" and she had to go sit down.

So I'm trying to practice them by myself, when Navy AC notices and says "What happened to your partner?" I told him and then he had me come over and work with him and another student without a partner.

This student though, was a big fellow. I'd say over a foot taller than me and at least a hundred pounds heavier, all muscle. And it was just in time for "Body Conditioning" where we learn how to take a hit.

Big Fellow looked just as nervous about hitting me as I felt about getting hit. His first punch barely tapped my stomach. I actually rolled me eyes and said, "you can hit me harder than that." So the next one became a light tap. Then Navy AC got in his face a bit and the NEXT hit doubled me over and popped my mouth protector out.

This was enough to bring the head instructor over who said something like "You can HIT her, but don't kill her." Navy AC was laughing and saying "It's okay She's TOUGH." and then of course, I was thinking things like "The tough instructor thinks I'm TOUGH" and then my mouth was saying "Yeah, I'm fine. I can take it" because apparently I'm insane. The Head Instructor said "Okay, but for ****-sake make sure she's breathing correctly."

I've heard a variation on this phrase many times in my life. For example, when I was in the Navy, me and another vertically challenged sailor were tasked with taping off the boiler pipes in Engineering so they could be painted. The PO in charge said "I'm going to send you in one at a time for 5 minutes each. Be careful, work fast, and for ****-sake don't let any of the pipes touch your bare skin."

Or another instant, when I was hanging upside down over the back of the ship and the PO in charge was instructing my safety, the last phrase was "and for ****-sake don't drop her." Since I was hanging over the screws (propellers for you landlubbers) I thought this was excellent advice.

Anyway, I took a couple more hits, and learned how to flex the ab muscles through breathing so it didn't hurt as much.

At the end of the class Navy AC raised his fist and we punched knuckles. That was awesome.

I was exhausted though. I came home and iced my knee, and almost fell asleep during Heroes.

Tuesday....I spent the day in PAIN. Agonizing pain. That's why I'm writing this a little late. Every time I thought about writing it up yesterday, I'd also think "Or I could just sit here, and read this webcomic a little more. I'll write this afternoon, when I feel a little more rested. Maybe when I get home. Maybe tomor..zzzzz."